Rider's Resolve (The Rider's Revenge Trilogy Book 3) Page 5

  It was only a matter of time until Luden stopped asking for the necklace and tried to take it from her instead. All it would take was one surprise blow to the head. She debated leaving, going to the Hidden City and Badru. Letting him have the tribe if that’s what he wanted so badly.

  But M’lara was so happy here. K’lrsa couldn’t take her away from that, not after everything else she’d lost in the last year.

  And what about F’lia? She wasn’t handling the pregnancy well; she’d gone to bed already, her cheeks pale, complaining that she no longer had any energy. She couldn’t leave her here. But she didn’t dare use the necklace to move her either. Not knowing the damage it could cause. Which meant a frantic escape on horseback with at least some following in pursuit.

  Luden might let her go, but he’d never let her leave with the necklace.

  So she had to stay for now.

  Which meant more conflict to come. Because Aran wasn’t done. He still had the rest of their children, and he was going to use them to get whatever it was he wanted.

  One way or another. Either overwhelm the tribes with too many mouths to feed until they collapsed under the strain, or use the children as hostages to extort the men to surrender or lead him to the Hidden City.

  They’d do it, too. They wouldn’t understand why it was so important to stand against him. All they’d see was that their children were in danger.

  They wouldn’t understand that letting Aran have access to the Hidden City would doom them all.

  Because the one thing she knew for certain was that Aran could never be given that kind of power. She didn’t know which weapon he’d choose—the sun orb that could burn anything, the walking stick that could drown the entire world, or something even worse, something she hadn’t even been shown because it was so terrible. But she knew what he’d do with it once he had it.

  He’d tear the world apart.

  And then it wouldn’t be twenty children that died, but every child. And man. And woman.

  She couldn’t let that happen. She wasn’t sure how to stop it, but she had to. One way or the other, she had to be the one to stand against him.

  Chapter 10

  The next morning when K’lrsa crawled out of the shelter of her tent, it felt like everyone was watching her even though no one would actually look at her. Those whose children had been returned clutched them close as she walked past. Like she was going to send them away now.

  What did they think she was? A heartless monster? How could she look into the eyes of a little boy barely able to walk and want to harm him in any way?

  Those whose children hadn’t been returned yet kept glancing in the direction of the barren lands, muttering softly to one another, and she noticed a small line of the newcomers stretched in that direction placed just close enough to one another to pass a signal if anyone else appeared there.

  No chance she’d know before Luden did this time.

  She found him and a few others standing together at the center of camp. They stopped talking when she reached them and the others walked away, glaring back at her as they left, leaving her alone with Luden.

  She ignored them just like she’d ignored all the others, focusing her attention on Luden. “We need to move on. Gather some sour greens and desert flowers, maybe see if the White Horse Tribe has more millet they can share with us. Hunt more baru.”

  “No.” He didn’t even bother to look at her. “We’ll stay here and wait for the next group to arrive.”

  She clenched her hands into fists, her nails digging grooves in her flesh. “We can’t. Don’t you get it? Life here isn’t like life in the Daliphana. We stay alive by moving. Look around you. If we don’t move now, what are we going to be eating three days from now? Or five days from now?”

  He glared at her. “I’m not leaving.”

  “Fine. I’ll go then. Someone has to.”

  “You can’t.” Luden stepped closer. “Unless you want to leave the necklace with me.”

  He held out his hand.

  Like she’d ever do that.

  “No.” He took half a step closer and she backed away. Her hand went to the necklace. “Step any closer and I’ll send you away.”

  “You can’t threaten me like that,” Luden said through gritted teeth. “I’m a member of this tribe.”

  “So am I.”

  “I didn’t even touch you.”

  K’lrsa rolled her eyes. “I’m not going to fight about this. I felt threatened, I reacted.” She crossed her arms across her chest. “So. I’m not allowed to leave camp now?”

  “No.”

  She looked towards where Fallion stood next to Kriger. How exactly did he think he was going to make her stay if she didn’t want to? Fallion would never let another touch him and she still had the necklace if it came to that.

  Luden cleared his throat. “And to make sure you actually listen…” He waited until she looked back at him. “We have M’lara.”

  “You what?”

  “She’s safe.”

  “Where is she?” She stepped closer to him, fury pounding in her veins, wanting nothing more than to take the last weeks’ worth of frustration out on him with her fists.

  “Not here.”

  “You took a child! How dare you!” Her hand crept towards the necklace, needing to feel the smooth metal of its curves even as she fought the desire to destroy them all. To send each and every newcomer into the barren lands.

  “It was the only way to assure your cooperation. I had to do what was best for my people.”

  “For your people? Is there even a Council anymore, Luden? Or do you just run everything now?”

  He didn’t answer.

  She glared at him as the moments stretched between them, neither of them backing down.

  Finally, he sighed and shook his head slightly, breaking eye contact. “This could’ve been so different, K’lrsa. But you had to fight me…”

  He signaled to two newcomers who were hovering nearby. “Take her back to her tent.” He met K’lrsa’s fury with a cool calculation. “If you care about your sister, you’ll stay there and won’t give me any more trouble.”

  “Is that so?” She was so angry she was trembling, tears threatening to fall from her eyes because she wanted so desperately to hurt him but couldn’t.

  “Yes.” He turned away, dismissing her.

  She wanted to fight the men who moved to take each of her arms, but she didn’t.

  She couldn’t.

  She needed time. To find M’lara.

  To think and plan and figure out how to leave and take those she loved with her.

  But once she decided…

  There wasn’t a place in this world Luden would be safe.

  Chapter 11

  K’lrsa kept to her tent through the rest of the day, watching over F’lia who’d stayed in bed, her forehead hot with fever. Vedhe brought them food, but there was no news. She didn’t know where they’d taken M’lara, only that it had happened at some time during the middle of the night, and that two of the newcomers were missing.

  Two men—Luden’s men, of course—stood outside her tent, keeping her inside and others from visiting her. Not that many tried, but a couple did, unsure what was happening or what they should do about it. K’lrsa paced the small confines of the tent, trying to figure out what she should do next.

  She didn’t think Luden would actually kill M’lara. Which meant her sister would be safe even if she left. But where would she go?

  To find Aran and kill him? All by herself?

  She’d tried that once.

  And almost succeeded, admittedly. But, as much as she loved him, Badru wasn’t Aran. Killing Badru would’ve been easy; Aran was far more crafty than that.

  She also suspected he knew how to counter the necklace.

  He wouldn’t die easily. He certainly hadn’t the last time someone killed him.

  She could go to the Hidden City to be with Badru. And her parents, it seemed. But she coul
dn’t. Not while Aran’s men were still threatening the border.

  Which brought her back to killing Aran.

  She needed allies.

  Vedhe would go. But who else?

  Her brother? No. He wouldn’t care. Not enough to leave his family and tribe behind. Or if he did, he wouldn’t see how she had a place in it. He’d go himself and order her to stay home.

  Too bad Herin was dead…

  She would’ve been the perfect choice to send after Aran. (Not that she’d done so well the first time she tried, but the clever old woman she was today was nothing compared to the naïve girl she’d been all those years ago.)

  K’lrsa shook her head. She actually missed the grel-like woman and her acerbic comments. As unpleasant as Herin had been at times, she’d had a mind for politics and was ruthless in going after her goals.

  If Badru were still alive…

  He’d been a trained warrior. And he had been the Daliph. The soldiers might even turn on Aran if they had Badru to follow. And if being a death walker didn’t disqualify Aran from being Daliph, it shouldn’t disqualify Badru.

  She sighed. Unfortunately, he too, was dead.

  Everyone was.

  Father Sun found her in the moon dream that night.

  He stood before her, his body crisscrossed by the scars of a thousand fights, his eyes burning like twin suns, and waited in silence as they stood together in the midst of an empty plain, devoid of life, the sun so hot K’lrsa felt like she was melting.

  Finally, she couldn’t stand the silence any longer. “What? What do you want now?”

  “Are you finally ready to kill Aran and fulfill your vow?”

  She narrowed her eyes. “I didn’t swear to kill Aran. I swore to destroy the Toreem Daliphate. Or don’t you remember? You are, after all, the one who showed me that lovely little scene the last time we met.”

  He smiled fiercely, his teeth surprisingly straight and white.

  “What?”

  “You know that’s why you’re my chosen one, don’t you? The way you make everyone feel like they’ve just thrust their hand into a fire when they cross you?”

  She snorted and looked away. Even her god didn’t like her. “I wish you hadn’t. I’d rather still be living my old life.”

  “That was never going to happen. Don’t think that because I chose you I set you on this path.”

  She wanted to argue with him, to point out that if he’d chosen someone else she might still be…What? Huddled in fear in the midst of her tribe as someone else tried to save them? Or worse, hiding away somewhere, safe, as the soldiers of the Daliphana destroyed the tribes because no one dared oppose them. Watching from a distance, powerless, as the Black Horse Tribe led slaves across the desert and her people slowly lost their way, seduced by the luxuries offered by trade?

  She frowned, wondering what she would’ve become without Fallion. And without her father’s faith that she’d make a good Rider. Without the years of training and trial that had prepared her for…something.

  She shook her head to clear away the thoughts. “So you chose me and the Lady Moon chose Badru and then you brought us together.”

  “Not exactly.”

  “Explain.”

  He raised one eyebrow at her tone, but a slight smile played across his lips. “I chose you. First. She chose him because he complemented you. If I hadn’t chosen you, she would have chosen another. Or if she’d chosen first, I might not have chosen you.”

  “So it didn’t matter that Badru was Daliph?”

  “No. Actually, when he was chosen, he wasn’t yet Daliph, and not likely to be.”

  K’lrsa wished Badru were there to hear that. He’d placed so much of his value in the fact that he was the Daliph that he’d almost been destroyed by losing his throne. But here was a god saying it didn’t matter, that it was something else about Badru that made him valuable.

  Just like she’d tried to tell him.

  She chewed on her lip, thinking. “And Vedhe? How does she fit into it? If you and the Lady choose champions that complement one another, then what does the Trickster choose?”

  He laughed softly. “The unexpected. My wife and I are the balance, he’s the chaos.”

  “Like that night when she led everyone to safety through the Trickster’s lands…” She nodded to herself. It made sense. But…

  “What happens when the balance isn’t there? When one half of the whole dies?”

  He studied her carefully. “I thought you weren’t even sure he was the one for you?”

  K’lrsa winced. “It’s not easy to be told that someone was chosen for you by the gods. I mean, yes, I was drawn to him the moment we met and I trusted him when I really shouldn’t have, and for no reason I could understand, and it turned out to be justified. But…” She sighed. “I like things I can see and feel and whatever it was between Badru and me, I couldn’t grasp it.”

  “But you believe in it now? You see how being with him made both of you stronger players in the game?”

  “Players? Game?” Her hands balled into fists. “Is that all this is to you? A game? This is my life. And Badru’s life. And the life of every single one of those people sleeping in that camp right now. We matter.”

  “Yes. Yes. I know. Your precious lives. All fifty, sixty years of them.”

  White-hot fury burned in her chest. “How dare you be so…so dismissive?”

  “How dare you be so short-sighted?” He stepped forward, glaring down at her, the heat from his body beating against her exposed skin. “You know this isn’t all there is. It’s just one step on your path. And a short one at that.”

  “Well, from where I’m standing, it’s the only one that matters. Do you think I care that we die and go to the Hidden City or the Promised Plains? There’s nothing there. It’s just a place for holding onto something we’ve already lost.”

  “I’m not talking about the Hidden City or the Promised Plains. I’m talking about what comes after.”

  She crossed her arms. “And what exactly is that?”

  “Does it matter? Isn’t it enough to know this isn’t the end?”

  “No.” She laughed harshly. “Because this is all I can see and feel. This is what matters for me. Here. Now. The rest is…Something I’ll deal with when I get there.”

  He smiled. “A warrior through and through. You never answered my question. Are you ready to kill Aran?”

  She turned away from him, gazing off into the distance as she chewed on her lip.

  Aran had to die. Until he did, he’d keep coming after them. But did she really have to be the one to defeat him? Why didn’t all those people who surrounded him, who knew what he was like and what he’d done, why didn’t they act? Why didn’t they say, “no”?

  Even a man like Aran was powerless without soldiers willing to die on his orders. Not to mention all the others who implemented his will and grew his food and sold his goods to pay for his conquests. Maybe not powerless—he did know how to bring people back from the dead—but even there, someone had had to save him when he was killed.

  All it would’ve taken to end this was for those who knew how to save him to stand aside and let him die. But they hadn’t. And now it fell upon her to either act, unlike all those others who’d come before her, or to stand aside and watch him destroy the world she loved.

  “Yes,” she sighed. “I’m ready to kill him. But I don’t know how. I can’t do this alone.”

  “You almost succeeded before…”

  “Yeah, well. Don’t underestimate the power of ignorance. I know better now.”

  He grinned at her before turning away, arms crossed comfortably, as he thought for a long moment. Finally, he turned back to her. “What if I could bring him back?”

  “Who?”

  He smiling slightly. “Badru.”

  “What?”

  Her stomach clenched. She didn’t want to hope, but she couldn’t control the soaring happiness that consumed her for a brief moment before
she quashed it and shoved it away.

  She studied Father Sun carefully. This was important. And dangerous. She needed to be careful. To be sure she understood what he was offering.

  And what price he’d demand. Because nothing was free with the gods.

  “Is that even possible?” she asked.

  He nodded. “Yes. I think so.”

  “And he’d really be back? He’d be alive, like I am.”

  “Yes.”

  “But he’s dead. He was dead the moment he crossed into the Hidden City.”

  He tilted his head to the side. “Yes…And no.”

  She wanted to shake him, but held back, waiting.

  “Badru’s dead if he leaves the city. Or if he continues on to the Promised Plains. Which is what usually happens in these situations. But as long as he remains in the Hidden City and takes care of his physical body as if he’s still alive—eating and sleeping, for example—he still lives.”

  “All that knowledge you shoved into my head and it didn’t include this?” She shouted, stepping towards him, fists clenched. She shook her head in disbelief. “This means we could’ve been together. Really been together. Lived in the Hidden City and grown old together and had children and…”

  She stepped away from him. “All those memories of all those people who’d wasted away trying to keep their love going…And it was all a lie. Of course it was.”

  “No. It wasn’t. All those stories were true. Those were stories of people who’d truly died in the real world and whose spirits had journeyed to the Hidden City. It’s different when a death walker comes to the city.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me before? Before I left him there? Before I committed to this tribe that doesn’t even want me?”

  “You needed to save the tribes. And to stay with them afterwards to protect them.”

  “You didn’t trust me. You kept this from me so I’d make the decision you wanted.”

  He didn’t answer, just waited for her to think it through.

  Would she have really returned to the tribes and stayed with them all these weeks, especially after they’d started to turn on her, if she’d known Badru was back in the Hidden City waiting for her?